I Lost My Heart, I Lost My Mind
by LyssaLa
Summary: Natsu is curious to what this mission is exactly. And why they are at some lame bar to do it at. Whoever thought this was a good group for a team must have been out of his mind. Of course, not everything is as it seems. Rated for Language, Sexual Themes.


**I was challenged, by an anon on tumblr, who encouraged me to write a bit of a dirty fic XP I was really going to just leave this on tumblr, but one of my girlies said I should put it up since everyone really liked it there! I put so much work into this. Mainly staying up till like 3am multiple nights lol Normally, it's really easy for me to write but this was a challenge. And I liked that ^^ So might as well share it with everyone! **

**I don't find this to be really smutty, dirty, yes, but they don't actually have sex in it. I wanted to start small XD I wrote it really graphic at first but it just didn't fit the situation. Their minds would be reeling with embarrassment, awkwardness, some confusion, and lots of love! It worked better when I took out some of the details and put more of them in it.**

**I'm also a girl. But I did at sometimes write from his mindset. All of that comes straight from my boyfriend. This is also the first I've written anything like this. Please pardon mistakes. I'm working on it! :]**

**Pairing: **Natsu and Lucy; Gajeel and Levy (mentioned)

**Timeline: **Anytime after Fighting Festival Arc

**Rating: **T+…erm M-…It's somewhere in the middle lol

**Dedication:** To everyone who encouraged me to actually keep going with this!

_**Disclaimer: **Totally don't own Fairy Tail or the characters either. That is Mashima-Sensei. And we love him very much! The title also comes from "Without You" sung by Usher. I don't know who wrote it. But that is theirs as well. Just so happens the song was on my playlist when I wrote this lol_

**__I Lost My Heart, I Lost My Mind__**

Natsu Dragneel looked around the room he was forced into. Music was being blasted into his ears, he felt like he was being blinded by the multi colored flashing lights, his body could feel the vibrations from the heavy bass; every color of the rainbow fog was being sent out throughout the area completely masking parts of the building. The large club was stuffy from all the people packed on the dance floor in front of him; his sensitive nose picking up more scents then he never wanted to smell. Even as he faced the dancing as it was called (he would rather say it just a bunch of people rubbing up on each other), his elbows on the bar behind him, the dragon slayer couldn't help but feel like this was no mission that he could have ever prepared himself for. He was even forced to wear full pants and shirts from Gray's wardrobe; and because Gray was an exobitionist, Natsu felt like the clothes clung to him like spandex.

"Why are we even here?" the pink haired teen whined over the noise, letting his head fall back dramatically. "What kind of mission are we on?"

Gray Fullbuster had been sitting next to Natsu for as long as they had been here but he was beginning to regret this decision as he tipped back another drink from off the bar. "We aren't on a mission, you moron," Gray rolled his eyes as the fire mage snapped his head over.

"What! Then why the hell are we here!"

The ice mage raised an eyebrow. "Did you not think it was odd the people Master hand chose for this 'mission'?"

Natsu contemplated that as he leaned back against the bar once more. "Well, not really."

"A representative from the council is coming down to the guild for the weekend," Gray tapped the bar, getting the attention of the busy bartender and rose his fingers up. "So Master needed to get rid of Fairy Tail's most rowdy."

The pink haired mage snorted. "Then all of Fairy Tail should be here."

The bartended dropped two drinks on the wood bar with a clank before moving back down the line.

Gray didn't disagree on that point as he slid a freshly poured drink over to Natsu. "True enough. Master just got rid of the people who start trouble most often. Cana tends to throw things when she gets drunk which of course always causes a brawl."

Cana Alberona had disappeared into the crowd, drink in hand, a while ago and Natsu had yet to see the brunette again. He gave Gray a nod of agreement on that one.

"I'm here because, well, I don't particularly think I need to say," the dark haired boy muttered before gulping down some of his drink. "You don't think about anything before you act and tend to destroy entire villages."

Natsu opened his mouth angrily to defend himself.

"Don't even try," Gray cut him off as he tossed some nearby pretzels at the pink haired boy's head. "You have no defense for yourself. While Gajeel thinks more than you, he is here for roughly the same reason."

Gajeel Redfox was another one Natsu hadn't seen since they arrived. He wasn't sure how he could lose that man; he was abnormally larger than just about everyone else here. "And the others?"

Gray glanced over at Natsu with a smug smile. "Master had Levy come to ensure that Gajeel would go along with it."

The dragon slayer choked into his drink. There were images starting to form in his head that he would never care to see again for his entire life. "And Lucy?" he coughed.

The ice mage still had his smug grin on even as he mentally decided not to repeat what Master Makarov had slyly joked. He was not having that conversation with Natsu in an overcrowded bar. "How would we have ever gotten you to think it was a mission if one of your partner's wasn't coming? It was weird enough that Happy had to stay back."

Natsu shrugged in agreement as he attempted to drink again. "I suppose you are right."

"Of course, I am."

"Cocky bastard."

"Is that all you got? Seriously, Natsu?"

The pink haired boy was about two seconds from lunging at Gray and that damn smirk of his when a flash of yellow caught his eyes. Natural instinct took over as his head whipped around. Lucy Heartfilia had gotten dragged off with Levy McGarden earlier; Natsu had tried to keep track of his partner but had lost her in the crowd about a half an hour prior. It was unnerving to say the least. Lucy was far too trusting to be out there. He strained his neck some to look around some of the people in his way to see Lucy, and Levy, both unharmed, if not a little tipsy. Well, considering the way Lucy was laughing maybe a little more than just tipsy.

"Someone catch your eye, flame brain?" Gray snickered, snapping Natsu back to the bar.

"Shove off, asshole," he grunted in response, crossing his arms across his chest. "I was just making sure they were okay."

"They are fine," a low voice rumbled from the other side of the duo causing both boys to look over at Gajeel who had only just let his presence known as he leaned up against the bar.

"Were you watching them?" Gray raised an amused eyebrow, drink in hand.

"You think I'd let blondie or shorty out there alone?" the iron dragon slayer scoffed looking back. "The alcoholic can take care of herself here but not those two."

Laughter drew Natsu's attention back to the girls who had moved farther out of the crowd. Lucy and Levy were talking close together due to the noise so much that Natsu couldn't even pick up on what they were saying, just their laughter every now and then, and the fact that they were still moving along to the music. Rather Lucy's hips were moving to the music; in slow side to side movements that Natsu's dark eyes suddenly couldn't break away from. She must have lifted her arms over her head for her pale skin was showing right above that small skirt. Almost unconsciously, Natsu's gaze lifted to her typically low cut shirt and to her somewhat flushed face. The fire dragon slayer had always found his partner ridiculously attractive, despite the fact he always tried to deny it, but for some reason it was hitting him more in this environment. It was suddenly affecting him to point of Natsu consciously hoping he wouldn't have to be standing up anytime soon.

Levy had looked up slightly with a grin on her face, giving a tap on Lucy's shoulder. The blond turned her head towards the boys since that just happened to be were Levy was pointing.

The fire mage growled and crossed his arms angrily. That traitor.

Lucy caught Natsu's slightly embarrassed eyes. He had every intention of looking away from her but her brown eyes remained locked on his. Her lips turned up in a smile; it wasn't a typical smile and Natsu couldn't quite place it. With one hand on her hip, Lucy raised her other hand and curled her pointer finger towards herself, beckoning the pink haired boy to come over. Natsu's eyes widened.

Oh…_Oh. _

That is what that smile was. Lucy was normally too cute to even seduce a bunny rabbit; it must have been the atmosphere or the alcohol. Natsu was not nearly as naive as he knew people thought he was. He just never felt the need to prove them wrong. Lucy was still watching him.

A throat cleared next to him. "It's not very polite to leave a lady waiting," Gajeel cut into his thoughts.

Natsu could feel the smirk on Gajeel's mouth. The pink haired boy had almost forgotten they were there. He heard a laugh erupt from Gray's mouth. "You two are both bastards," he growled feeling his face grow a little hot even for him. Not for the first time tonight, he was thankful the bar was so dark. The pink haired boy glanced back at the blond who hadn't moved. Levy, he noticed, was missing, but Lucy remained the same. Her face had fallen some; it would have been unnoticeable to anyone but him. With a pang to the chest, he realized that was his fault. There went his hope of not having to get up, that was still a raging problem. Natsu had to hand it to Gray's tight pants. Uncomfortable, yes, well, very uncomfortable at the moment, but concealing enough as he stood up to his feet to walk the short distance to Lucy. Gajeel and Gray were still laughing obnoxiously. He would need to start planning pay back soon.

Lucy grinned widely at him before he even reached her. "Are you having fun?"

Natsu shrugged indifferently when he got close enough to talk to her. He didn't think any closer right now would be a benefit to him. Well…his mind wandered ever so slightly down a train of thought that came to him far too much about his best friend. He shook his head lightly to help shake away the thoughts of how much he would love to push her into the crowd behind her were they would be no more space between them. Those thoughts were certainly not benefitting him nor were these, now moved beyond tight to painfully tight, pants. "Gray told me Master was just trying to get rid of us."

The blond had begun to sway her hips to the music again as she giggled. "Yeah, sorry we had to lie to you. He figured you won't go if you didn't think wasn't going to be anyone to beat up."

Natsu had to remind himself not to get mesmerized her moving hips again. "I don't know, I have a funny feeling that guy over there is about two seconds from getting his ass handed to him." He pointed off to the side where a man was being awfully friendly with the short blue haired girl they had come with. Levy was being polite and kind back to the man though she seemed disinterested. Natsu was actually quite surprised the glass cup in Gajeel's hand hadn't broken yet as he watched the scene.

Lucy took a step towards Natsu and put her hands lightly on his chest to look over his shoulder for a better view. The fire mage immediatly stepped back out of her reach, her hands falling limply in front of her. Her face gave him a confused look. "Natsu?"

The boy shook his head slightly in response as he crossed his arms desperately racking his brain from something that wasn't Lucy. It was becoming increasingly difficult due to being so close to her, that sweet smell of hers was making him feel dizzy and his thoughts of her just continued growing. How many times had he mentally rebuked himself for this? He didn't even know anymore. Nothing made him feel more guilty than fantasying about Lucy, his best friend, of all people, yet never enough to make them fully go away. His feelings for her were too strong and he knew it.

"You don't look so good," her voice brought him back to reality. There was Lucy, her faced etched with concern as she tried to step forward towards him again.

"I'm fine, Lucy, just stop already," Natsu snapped, taking steps back again to keep distance.

Oh he had done it now. He knew it the moment he heard the frustrated tone he hadn't meant to take with her. He wasn't mad at her. How could he ever be? But she didn't know that. He watched her brown eyes fall, for a moment he thought she was going to cry but her face turned angry just as fast.

"No need to be such a bastard, Natsu," she spat before turning back into the crowd of oblivious people behind her.

The fire mage blinked at her disappearing image before it hit him that she was gone. And that it was his own damn fault. "Lucy, wait!" he called after her before pushing his way into the crowd of oversexed dancers. He cursed as he attempted to follow her blond head of hair though the dark club. It helped he was attuned to her scent and could pick it out over the rest of the smells, no matter how somewhat nauseating they were. Natsu had to force his way through more than once, earning glares all around. He was ungracefully shoved of the dance floor into a hallway that looked like it led to a store room of sorts. With a growl he had every intention of throwing himself back in there to find Lucy when a chocked sound made his ears perk up. He turned around to see the very blond he was looking for leaning against the wall and rubbing her eyes furiously. "Lucy," he sighed, relived to have found her. "What are you doing?"

Lucy's head whipped up barely showing her tear stricken eyes. Her normally sweet face turned vicious again. "God, Natsu, just go away already," the celestial spirit mage pushed herself away from the wall in an attempt to leave again but before she could even more an inch two hands were on either side of her head. She squeaked in surprise when she found the dragon slayer right in front of her.

Natsu hadn't meant to scare her, nor be so close to her but there was no way he could let her be upset, especially if it was because of him. "What's the matter, Luce?"

The blond reached up to push him away. "Why can't you just leave me alone? You made it pretty clear already you don't want to be around me," she snarled through gritted teeth as she attempted to push the man away.

Natsu didn't even flinch under her hits. "I didn't mean it like that," he could still see the tears in her eyes. "I was just," he paused to phrase correctly. "Frustrated. You gonna to tell me what's really wrong? Normally you could care less what I say to you."

"I always care what you say to me!" Lucy started to hit at his shoulders again in anger, her emotions spilling out. "You are just too clueless to even understand! I was _trying_ to put myself out there and to get your attention but no, Natsu Dragneel wouldn't know when a girl was attempting to show her feelings for him. You are the densest person I have ever met!"

Natsu blinked at her heaving face, her words ringing in his ears. Had she just…? His mind still clicking away he didn't even notice that Lucy's hands had moved from his shoulders to entangle themselves in his thick hair until she pulled his face inches away from his. The dragon slayer was currently in a state of shock as her warm breath mingled with his. "Seriously, how could you not know how much I love you, Idiot." Not giving him a moment to respond, Lucy pushed her lips against his.

The pink haired mage had decided trying to process this situation was highly overrated. He kissed her back with such a force that back of her head nearly hit the wall.

Lucy pulled away slightly, now she was the one looking surprised. Her hands remained tightly in his hair as if she was afraid to let him go.

"Dense maybe," he breathed against her lips. "But not stupid."

Lucy arched an eyebrow him, a smile tugging at her lips.

"Well, maybe a little," he closed the small distance between their mouths. Her soft lips moved with his tentatively at first but when he felt her hands pull on his hair ever so slightly Natsu pressed his mouth as close to hers as possible. His hands gripped the wall behind her head as Lucy mover her lips furiously with his. He could feel his body radiating with heat.

The blond broke away from him once more, her breathing increasing. "Why…why did you keep pushing me away before?"

Natsu couldn't hold the light laugh in. He supposed it was pretty irrelevant at this point. "You want to know?"

"I wouldn't have asked if I didn't," Lucy muttered, pulling her head back. The weight of the situation was hitting her as she felt the blood rush to her face. She hesitantly ran hands down his neck and onto his shoulders, trying to control the nervous shaking she was feeling; her angry confidence had left her, leaving just Lucy. She was surprised when a visible shiver went through the boy in front of her as he closed his eyes. His hands slowly moved away from the wall and fell lightly onto her waist. Natsu trailed kisses across her jaw line until her reached right under her ear. In a swift movement, he pressed his body fully against hers, nudging a leg in between hers. Lucy gasped at the sudden pressure of his warm body against hers, her fingernails pressing into his shoulders.

Natsu left his head in her collarbone. "I…I," he hesitated as her felt the blond's quaking body underneath him. He didn't know what to say. He was embarrassed? He didn't want her to know that he had far more than friendly thoughts about her? He was so ridiculously in love with the celestial spirit mage that he didn't know how to function without her anymore? Of course, none of that would pass his lips. "I didn't want you to notice what you do to me." As if to enforce his words she felt a pulse on the inside of her thigh. The pink haired boy winced slightly as embarrassment hit him. Natsu carefully glanced over at Lucy for she had yet to respond to him. Her brown eyes were looking over at him; her mouth still wide open.

Lucy was feeling a bit stunned herself. She had complained one too many times to Levy that Natsu never even looked her way no matter how much she tried, causing Levy to give her the idea to try a little more sexuality, that even Natsu couldn't be that ignorant. Lucy had never actually thought it would work, she really did think Natsu was that ignorant sometimes. But as he stood there, his body fitting firmly against hers, Lucy was sincerely doubting her previous notions.

"Natsu?" Lucy called carefully.

The dragon slayer slowly raised his heated face to hers. His dark eyes were wide and his expression was just so Natsu, Lucy couldn't even hold back a smile. The music from the nearby club could barely be heard by them anymore, the presence of anyone else wasn't even registering. Nothing else mattered when Lucy pulled his face against hers again. No one else mattered when his mouth was on hers. She wrapped her arms around his neck effectively pulling him even closer, her chest pressing into his, causing his hands to tighten on her waist. She slowly ran her tongue lightly against his lips, coaxing him to deepen their already feverish kiss. He had no problems obliging.

Natsu ran his hands down her sides to where a small patch of her skin was showing. His hitched his thumbs underneath the fabric to push it up more until his fingers grazed over her soft skin causing Goosebumps to form under his touch.

His hands traveled to the small of her back, rubbing small circular movements as he moved; he could feel Lucy shivering at each movement. She brought her teeth down on his lip as she pulled away from him. Natsu pressed his forehead against hers, trying to catch his breath. Lucy chest heaved, her arms still holding him close. He locked eyes with her as he let his hands trace her lower back before reaching her skirt line. The fire mage let his hands hover slightly before he got the "what are you waiting for look" from the girl underneath him. With a smirk, his hands firmly pressed down against her backside causing Lucy to whimper aloud. He easily flipped the short length of the skirt up and over so he could fully feel the mix of lacey material and skin. Lucy buried her face in his neck as shivers went through her body. It was uncontrollable. His rough hands on such a sensitive part of her body made her feel like she was no longer in any control of her body. The girl was so distracted by the sensations racking her body that she had barely realized that Natsu had lifted her off her feet. He used his upper body to press her close to the wall while he ran his hands down the back of her thighs to coax her legs around his waist. Lucy didn't need to be told twice.

The instant her legs were tight around him, his hand still running along her thighs, Lucy grabbed his head, forcing his lips back to hers. Natsu was beginning to lose any restraint he had as he fiercely opened his mouth against hers, deepening their kiss. Never. He never thought. Not with Lucy. His Lucy. His mind couldn't even hold onto thought strains anymore.

Lucy had already begun to slip against the bricks. Using her legs as leverage she lifted her hips up to help from falling. Natsu's head snapped up with a growl, his eyes fierce, as his hands firmly grabbed her hips from underneath her skirt. He pulled her into him as he rolled his hips against hers eliciting a moan from the blond. He let his head fall back against her chest but Lucy wasn't having that. She lightly moved her hips again.

"Lucy," Natsu groaned against her bare skin, his hands still pressed into her hips. He couldn't have controlled himself if he wanted to. He grinded himself into her again; this time she was prepared for it and met his movement with one of her own. The fire mage didn't even bother holding in a low moan as his swollen lips reached up to her mouth. He pressed into her rhythmically, Lucy moved with him; whimpers and moans reverberated against their mouths. Natsu was becoming more aware of the fact that Lucy was so outrageously wet that he could feel her through his jeans. He was having the same difficulty from the inside as he was dripping everywhere. He highly doubted Gray would ever want these back. The dragon slayer broke away to run hard kisses down Lucy's neck causing her head to practically slam against the wall. Without a moment of though, he bit down on her collar bone. The blond withered as twitches shook her body. Natsu had to grin against her skin, adoring the way she reacted to his every touch. He nipped gently at her skin, moving down lower to her open chest. Lucy violently rocked her hips against him catching Natsu off guard. Fire filled the pit of his stomach.

"Lucy," he warned through gritted teeth, his head still against her skin while his hands continued to hold her hips so she wouldn't move again.

A smug smile filled the girl's face. "Feel good?" She tightened her legs around his waist and rolled her hips again getting a hiss from the fire mage who had looked up to press his forehead to hers.

"It feels too damn good," he groaned his resolve cracking all around him as he felt her hot breath on him. There was nothing more that he wanted at this moment than Lucy. And all of her. Today. Tomorrow. The next day, month, year, whatever, however, whenever. His body collapsed on hers, his head falling in her neck. The dragon slayer's grip on her hips had not loosened for he was going to lose it. Lucy was not going to have that. Despite his strength she wiggled herself against him, trying to create more friction between them.

"Fuck," the fire mage moaned against her neck, giving her a forceful grind.

"Please, Natsu," Lucy tried to move again, dying to feel every bit of him, but Natsu wouldn't let her move again.

"Just give me a minute, Jesus, Luce, you are going to kill me," he breathed heavily trying to regain any self control he might have started the night with. It wasn't going so well.

"Well, there you two are," a far too familiar voice called out far too closely.

Both Natsu and Lucy's heads snapped away from each other to see Cana leaning up against the wall near them, taking another drink from her bottle. Lucy attempted to hurriedly adjust herself as Natsu let her go so her feet could hit the floor.

"What the hell do you want," Natsu had to stop himself from yelling at her, despite his outrageous blush for being caught. More particularly in that position.

Cana raised an eyebrow, like she just noticed they were there. Lucy and Natsu were flushed beyond what any normal person could possibly be, not to mention their heads of hair looked like a tornado has blown through. "Obviously not what you two want."

Lucy let out an embarrassed squeal as her face turned even redder.

"Cana, don't even-" Nastu started to warn, shakily crossing his arms, but Cana waved him off.

"You think I'm even going to remember this in the morning? Now come on, we are leaving," she turned her back to them with a slight stagger. "I suggest you fix your skirt Lucy and attempt to hide the fact you practically just had sex in the back hallway of a club."

"I'm gonna murder her," Natsu growled angrily. "I swear…"

Lucy glanced over at Natsu, her face still feeling like it was on fire. She opened her mouth to say something, anything but word seemed to fail her. Everything was different now.

The fire dragon slayer could feel her eyes on him as he turned to look at her wide eyes. "Why are you looking at me like that," he snorted, still bitter with Cana.

The celestial spirit mage snapped her glance away suddenly feeling ridiculously stupid. Of course. This was still Natsu. "I'm just gonna…just gonna go…" she stuttered as she started to stumble away from this place. Yet before she could even take two embarrassed steps away Lucy felt two ever familiar strong arms lift her off her feet. She couldn't help but scream in surprise when she found herself being slung over Natsu's shoulder.

"Where do you think you are going?" he eyed her as she dangled behind him.

"Natsu!" Lucy squealed feeling like she was about to fall off of him.

"Don't you go runnin' off on me," he raised an eyebrow at her. "I'm dense, yah, I know that. But I disagree with you on me being stupid."

Lucy sighed against his back. "This again, Nastsu? Seriously? Dense sure is right."

"I'd have to be the stupidest person in the whole entire universe not to love you," he smiled smugly at her. "Therefore, my stupidity is not as high as you all seem to think."

Lucy, yet another time this night, had felt like all the air had been sucked out of her lungs. Did he just…? Was that…? She gaped at him, still hanging limply over his shoulder.

Nastu shifted her on his body so that she really wouldn't fall before he started walking again. "We really should go make sure Gajeel didn't murder anyone. Unless it's Cana," he added with a grumble which couldn't not make Lucy laugh. He was just so Natsu. He did everything in his own way. She wouldn't have it any other way. She relaxed her body while he carried her through the crowd that had already thinned out. She could feel his fingers lightly tracing her bare legs as he gently let his head fall on her body. "And hope they don't use black light here."

**Welp. There you have it. See! Told you it wasn't _that_ smutty. Baby steps here ;D I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did writing it! Let me know what you thought :D**

**~Lyssa**


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